Thrive – The Happiness Movement

A happy face can certainly lift spirits, but can it reduce rage?

Studies have documented that the physical act of smiling is a universal, and effective way to lift mood, if briefly. But in the latest research on the power of the smile, researchers led by Marcus Munafo of the University of Bristol in England found that even seeing smiles on the faces of others can have a profound effect on a person’s tendency toward violence or aggression— that is, as long as that person recognizes the smile as one of happiness, and not as a sneer.

Munafo and his colleagues conducted a series of experiments involving normal adults as well as highly aggressive teens who had been referred to a youth program, either by educational authorities or the courts. About 70% of the teens already had a criminal record.

In the first experiment, 40 healthy adults, aged 18-30, looked at computer images of faces that had been morphed to show facial expressions that ranged from happy to angry with increasingly difficult to discern expressions in between. Participants were asked how angry they felt and then had to rate the images as displaying either happiness or anger — there was no option for “ambiguous” or “unable to tell.” From these ratings, the scientists were able to generate a score of their biases toward happiness or anger as reflected by where the volunteers decided that happiness ended and anger began.

Previous research found that aggressive people — including violent offenders — tend to interpret even neutral expressions as hostile: “You looking at me?” can easily turn what would have been a nonevent into a tragic confrontation, so preventing such misinterpretations could have important implications.

Based on their initial scores, half of the healthy participants were then told by the computer that some of the ambiguous faces that they had rated as angry should have been scored as happy. This was intended to bias them toward judging the in-between faces more positively. The other 20 received feedback that simply validated their prior choices, creating a control group.

After this training, both groups were tested again and the group that received the biased feedback shifted its ratings of ambiguous faces toward the happy side. Participants were also asked to rate their level of angry feelings again after completing the second round of testing. Those who were trained to interpret ambiguous faces as happier actually reported feeling less angry afterward compared to the controls.

The researchers next focused on the 46 adolescents from the high risk youth program, ranging in age from 11 to 16. These teens completed the same testing, but both the youth and the staff reported on the teens’ levels of aggressive behavior before the testing started and for two weeks afterward. The teens who had been trained to interpret ambiguous facial expressions more positively were significantly less aggressive two weeks later, as rated by both the staff (who did not know which kids were in the intervention group) and by themselves.

“The results of our experiments strongly suggest that biases in the perception of emotional facial expressions play a causal role in subjective anger and aggressive behavior,” the authors conclude.

That doesn’t mean that smiles alone are the answer to violence among adolescents — previous research in which antisocial youth were trained to better recognize emotions, for example, did not have any effect on their level of aggressive behavior. But this earlier study focused on improving teens’ perception of clear facial signals, not ambiguous ones. Since ambiguous signals are more prone to misinterpretation, it may be that violent behavior in some youth is perpetuated by their constant misintepretation of angry expressions where they don’t exist, that push them to combative responses. The findings suggest that helping young people, particularly those who are prone to violence, to learn to give others the benefit of the doubt when they see what they think is a threatening face could help end the vicious cycle of violence.

Original Source: Time

Read full article here.

Tony Tolbert, a Harvard educated attorney, practiced an amazing gesture of generosity when he donated his home to a homeless family. The 51-year-old will move back into his family’s house instead.

According to CBS, Tolbert had grown up in a house where someone in need often stayed. Hoping to follow the example of his father’s generosity, Tolbert told the Alexandria House, a shelter for women and children, that he wanted to donate his home for a year. At that point he had not yet met Felicia Dukes, the mother of three whose life he would greatly improve.

Dukes was baffled when Alexandria told her someone wanted to give her a whole house for her and her kids.

“They had a young man that wanted to donate their house to you for a year,” Dukes recounted. “And I’m looking at her, like, what? Like — Are you serious?”

One room at the shelter was barely enough space for her family, and even more important, Tolbert’s house allows for Dukes’ oldest son to live with her. At Alexandria, he was not permitted to stay, as the shelter only admitted women and children.

In a CBS interview, Tolbert said, “If I consider myself a generous person then be generous. Practice generosity… You don’t have to be Bill Gates or Warren Buffet or Oprah. We can do it wherever we are with whatever we have.”

Dukes teared up explaining how grateful she was for Tolbert’s incredible gift.

“You know, my heart fills up and stuff,” she said, “I’m just really happy.”

Original source: HooplaHa

Read full article and watch video here.

Yellow is my absolute, concrete, 100% favourite colour. It is happy, and regal and just plain cheerful! So, without further adieu (or argument from any yellow haters) I am going to tell you the scientific reason that yellow is awesome.

Here are my highly professional, very scientific findings:

Physiological Effect: Yellow has proven to stimulate the brain. This stimulation can make you more alert and decisive. This colour makes muscles more energetic and activates the lymph system.

Psychological Effect: Similarly to Orange, Yellow is a happy and uplifting colour. It can also be associated with intellectual thinking: discernment, memory, clear thinking, decision-making and good judgment. It also aids in organization and understanding of different points of view. Yellow builds self-confidence and encourages optimism.

Seriously though, if you don’t believe that yellow is a happy colour, go down to your local hardware store and read some of the names they give their yellow paint. Here are a few (also awesome) examples from our old friend Dulux.

On that note I will leave you but before I do, here is a link to a Pinterest board full of cheerful yellow stuff. Your welcome!

http://pinterest.com/katiehatch/color-yellow/

Today is special…

You’ll never get it back.

But it doesn’t have to be another, ordinary boring day

Do something memorable!

… Because let’s be honest

How many days of this past month do you actually remember?

Or will you remember in 10 years?

Yes, think about the future, but also live your life now before it passes you by-

Seize the day!

And don’t forget to just live life to the fullest.

: )

There is no denying that some are naturally happier than others. After all, this is reality. But, just because we can’t all be instinctively happy, doesn’t mean we can’t cultivate our own happiness. So, how do we do this when reality is throwing us curve balls (the size of a small planet) day after day? You could wait around for someone to lift you out of your rut or you can take action, after all, this is your life.

1. Stop waiting to be rescued from your situation. There is always someone on your side. They may be encouraging and supportive but at the end of the day, the only person who can truly change your life is YOU. You aren’t going to find happiness in a book or a guru, or a new relationship, the answer is inside you. The hard part is, deep down inside, many of us already know what to do to make ourselves happy, but the thought of actually doing it is scary! The reality of it is, there is no time like the present. Take control of your life today, your relationships, your body, your finances, your career and your attitude. Control what you can and don’t waste energy on what you can’t. As much as we wish super heroes were real… at the end of the day you have to save yourself, be your own hero.

2. Take a positive step every day. We all have a to-do list that gets longer by the day and there is always an excuse to pretend it doesn’t exist but the truth is, completing goals is one of the most fulfilling things we can do. So, try doing something every day (yep, every single day) that you should do or have always wanted to do. It might be something huge like going to A.A. for the first time, it might be something like healing a damaged relationship or it could be something simple (but significant nonetheless) like going for a twenty minute walk or reducing your chocolate intake by half. As you tick those boxes day after day, your thinking will change, your motivation will increase, you’ll become more productive and proactive, and pretty soon you’ll be living in a different place. If you are the visual type, sit yourself down and make a checklist. Then treat yourself to a pretty pen and get ticking!

3. Put things into perspective. Sometimes we just need to remind ourselves how hard our life isn’t! Things can always, always be worse and sometimes we make our lives harder than they need to be. I love to picture myself in 20 years, giggling at how dramatic I was being, with a big goofy smile on my dial. Also, if you are one of those people who shudder at the thought of high school and all its bad memories, try to think back to a specific time or event that was so terrible. I bet you can only remember a couple. Yet don’t you tell yourself you were unhappy most of the time? The fact is we, as humans, forget! We go through hard times then we come out the other side feeling happy and the bad memories fade. No matter what is happening in your life right now, it will get easier. The bad will fade and the good will grow.

6. Get involved in a project other than yourself! The more self-absorbed we are, the unhappier we’ll be and the longer we’ll stay in our rut. Ironically, sometimes the answer to overcoming some of our issues is to not focus on (obsess about) our issues. Weird huh? When we become more focused on giving (rather than getting) amazing things happen. We often find a new sense of purpose, we feel needed, wanted and appreciated and we start to shift from a negative to a positive mindset. From selfish to selfless

There are hundreds of things you can do to get yourself out of your rut but at the core of it all you have to remember that to change you have to make changes.

You deserve to be happy.

Do this for you.

Does the idea of being fun and delightful when expressing gratitude freak you out a little? No need to get stressed- but it is indeed a wonderful and very important gesture to say thank you. Just imagine you’re writing a note to your BFF. Be funny, grateful, refreshing. If being funny causes stress, there’s always sweet, warm, and sincere. Still overwhelmed? Don’t fret. Here’s a few fun ways to say thanks to get you started.

1. If it wasn’t weird, I would have sent you a picture of myself. Because I look totally grateful.
2. Great googly gratitude. Thanks so much for your gift!
3. Thank you (not sent from my iPhone).
4. Next time, I’m sending you a cape. Thanks for your superhero-sized gift.
5. Two words: Endless gratitude. Thank you.
6. You score phenomenally high in the kind-o-meter. Seriously, I checked.
7. Your version of shine is a search light. Thanks for spreading so much good.
8. Thanks so much for putting up with our direct mail. But even more, thank you for responding.
9. You’re kind of a big deal. Don’t believe me? Ask our clients.
10. You = awesome. Me = grateful.
11. Move over Gates and Buffett, there’s a new philanthropist in town.
12. Our clients have started an unofficial fan club. You should start practicing your autograph.
13. Do you practice being so wonderful? Thank you kindly for your gift.
14. Amazed. Inspired. Grateful. That’s how your generosity makes me feel.
15. When it comes to making an impact, you rule. (Note: Draw a ruler. You can do it.)
16. You’re a spark plug for good. Thanks for igniting something amazing.
17. a) A peach b) Bee’s knees c) Cat’s pajamas. You’re d) All of the above. Thanks for your bigheartedness.
18. You’re what making a difference looks like. (Note: Draw a mirror. Up the fun factor.)
19. You’re a lifesaver. Literally. And thanks for believing in someone you don’t even know.
20. Is there no limit to your awesomeness? Thank you!
21. You can’t see me but I’m totally doing a happy dance.
22. I’m beginning to think you’re serious about this whole humanitarian thing.

Let us know if you decide to try any of these out

• 1. Today, my son turned 7 and I turned 23.  Yes, I had him on the day I turned 16.  The choices I made when I was a teenager were foolish, and sometimes I get worried I’m bringing my son up wrong.  But today I took him to the park to celebrate our birthdays.  He played for hours with a girl who has burn scars that cover most of her face.  When my son took a break to eat, he pointed to her and said, “She’s so pretty and cool!”  Which left me thinking, “I must be doing something right as a mom.”

• 2. Today at 1AM, my grandma, who is suffering from Alzheimer’s, got up, got into my dad’s car and drove off.  We contacted the police.  But before the police could find her, two college kids pulled into our driveway with my grandma.  One was driving my dad’s car and the other was following in their car.  They said they overheard her crying about being lost at an empty gas station 10 miles away.  My grandma couldn’t remember our address, but gave the kids her first and last name.  They looked her up online, found our address, and drove her home.

• 3. Today, my 8-year-old son hugged me and said, “You are the best mom in the whole entire world!”  I smiled and sarcastically replied, “How do you know that?  You haven’t met every mom in the whole entire world.”  My son squeezed me tighter and said, “Yes I have.  You are my world.”

• 4. Today, my dad turned 91.  He barely has enough strength to speak.  But every time my mom (she’s 84) walks into the room to check on him, he says, “Hello beautiful.”

• 5. Today, when I went to pick-up my daughter from preschool she was sitting on the ground in the corner of the after-care area with 3 blind students.  All of them had smiles on their faces.  The after-care instructor told me my daughter has been spending time with these 3 students every afternoon this week, answering questions and explaining to them in vivid detail what different objects, people and animals look like.

• 6. Today, when she woke up from a six month coma, she kissed me and said, “Thank you for being here, and telling me those beautiful stories, and never giving up on me…  And yes, I will marry you.”

• 7. Today, I found an old hand written note my mom wrote when she was a senior in high school.  On it is a list of qualities she hoped she would someday find in a boyfriend.  The list is basically an exact description of my dad, who she didn’t meet until she was 27.

• 8. Today is my 18th birthday.  Just over 18 years ago a woman was faced with the harsh fact that she had already had 4 miscarriages and 1 stillbirth.  As she was pregnant for the 5th time, doctors informed her that her pregnancy was risky.  They said there was a good chance either the baby or her wouldn’t make it.  She chose to give the baby a chance anyway.  My mom and I both made it and are still healthy to this day.

• 9. Today, my grandpa keeps and old, candid photo on his nightstand of my grandma and him laughing together at some party in the 1960’s.  My grandma passed away from cancer in 1999 when I was 7.  This evening when I was at his house, my grandpa caught me staring at the photo.  He walked up, hugged me from behind and said, “Remember, just because something doesn’t last forever, doesn’t mean it wasn’t worth your while.”

• 10. Today, a week after I donated three bags of clothes to a local homeless shelter, I saw a homeless woman sitting on a park bench wearing a tye-dye shirt I made when I was a teenager.  I walked by her and said, “I love your shirt!”  She smiled and said, “Thank you!  I really do too!”

• 11. Today, I sat down with my two daughters, ages 4 and 6, to explain to them that we have to move out of our 4 bedroom house and into a 2 bedroom apartment for awhile until I can find another job that pays well.  My daughters looked at each other for a moment and then my youngest daughter turned to me and asked, “Are we all moving into the apartment together?”  “Yes,” I replied.  “Oh, so no big deal then,” she said.

• 12. Today is the 14th day in a row that my nursing home patient’s grandson has come to visit her.  Two weeks ago I told him that the only time I see his grandmother smile all week is when he visits her on Sunday mornings.

• 13. Today, as I pulled into my apartment complex I noticed my neighbor, who’s about 8 months pregnant, struggling with her groceries.  I stopped and helped her bring them up the stairs into her apartment.  This evening, when I got home from the gym I found a freshly baked apple pie sealed in Tupperware sitting on my doorstep with a note that said, “I used the ingredients you helped me carry to bake this.  Enjoy!”

• 14. Today, a man came in to apply at my restaurant.  He seemed charismatic, kind, knowledgeable, and friendly.  Later, when I went to call him to extend a job offer, I noticed he had written “ask for me” under his number.  The number belongs to a homeless shelter.  But I’m gonna take a risk and hire him anyways.

• 15. Today, I found out that my mom and dad have been working second jobs at night so they can continue to financially assist my twin sister and I who are both sophomores in college.  My dad said, “You two will be the first in our family’s history to receive college diplomas.  Two jobs is nothing!  I’d work three if I had to to see you two graduate.”

• 16. Today, my 12-year-old son, Sean, and I stopped by the nursing home together for the first time in several months.  Usually I come alone see my mother who’s suffering from Alzheimer’s.  When we walked into the lobby, the nurse said, “Hi, Sean!” and then buzzed us in.  “How does she know your name?” I asked.  “Oh, I swing by here on my walk home from school all the time to say hi to Grandma,” Sean said.  I had no idea.

• 17. Today, my mom has been blind for 15 years.  She lost her vision in the same car accident that took my dad’s life.  I am 18 years old now.  She has raised me as a single mom since I was 3, without her vision.  And yes, she did a heck of a job!

• 18. Today, I met the prettiest woman on a plane.  Assuming I wouldn’t see her again after we made our connections, I told her how pretty I thought she was.  She gave me the most sincere smile and said, “Nobody has said that to me in 10 years.”  It turns out we’re both in our mid-30’s, never married, no kids, and we live about 5 miles away from each other.  We have a date set for next Saturday after we return home.

• 19. Today, my mom received the surgery she needed to remove a malignant tumor.  My family has been struggling without medical insurance since my dad lost his job last year.  My sister and I have been openly discussing my mom’s medical dilemma on Facebook.  Last week, a friend of a friend, who’s a veteran cancer treatment surgeon who owns his own practice, saw our comments on Facebook and volunteered to help my mother for free.

• 20. Today, I’m a mother of 2 and a grandmother of 4.  At 17 I got pregnant with twins.  When my boyfriend and friends found out I wasn’t going to abort them, they turned a cold shoulder to me.  But I pressed forward, worked full-time while attending school, graduated high school and college, and met a guy in one of my classes who has loved my children like his own for the last 50 years.

• 21. Today, as I was sleeping, I woke up to my daughter calling my name.  I was sleeping in a sofa chair in her hospital room.  I opened my eyes to her beautiful smile.  My daughter has been in a coma for 98 days.

• 22. Today, on our 10th wedding anniversary, she handed me a suicide note she wrote when she was 22. It was dated the exact day we met each other.  And she said, “For all these years I didn’t want you to know how foolish and unstable I was back when we met.  But even though you didn’t know, you saved me.  Thank you.”

• 23. Today, at 8AM this morning, after four months of lifelessness in her hospital bed, we took my mom off life support.  And her heart continued beating on its own.  And she continued breathing on her own.  Then this evening, when I squeezed her hand three times, she squeezed back three times.

• 24. Today, the homeless man who used to sleep near my condo showed up at my door wearing the business suit I gave him nearly 10 years ago.  He said, “I have a home, a job, and a family now.  10 years ago I wore this business suit to all my job interviews.  Thank you.”

• 25. Today, when I opened my store at 5AM there was an envelope sitting on the floor by the door.  In the envelope was $600 and a note that said, “Five years ago, I broke into your store at night and stole $300 worth of food.  I’m sorry.  I was desperate.  Here’s the money with 100% interest.”  Interestingly, I never reported the incident to the cops because I assumed that whoever stole the food really needed it.

Stories taken from Makes Me Think